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April 20, 2008
Compassion and Betrayal

We all know that those closest to us are the ones that can hurt us. The members of our family or our spouse are those with whom we are most vulnerable and therefore most exposed to being disappointed. When we are vulnerable we open ourselves by letting down our guard and allowing those who love […]

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April 14, 2008
Kids Without Shame

There were a couple of new events recently that caught anyone's attention who saw them. One was the brutal beating of a young girl shown on You Tube by her so called friends and the other was a report on out of control behavior by students on spring break. According to the Florida story on […]

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April 5, 2008
Place of Pain, Place of Hope

Every week couples come into my office facing a crisis in their marriage. They are typically at the end of their rope with each other and are often ready to separate. They are asking the question would I be better off if I were not with this person. They are wondering if their life would […]

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March 22, 2008
Easter Reflection

Easter is the most important, significant, and meaningful remembrance of Jesus. And yet it receives much less publicity and celebration than Christmas. This might be because generally it is much easier for us to become excited and celebrate a baby's birth than a man's murder. The birth of a baby is also common to human […]

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March 15, 2008
Considering Sin

This is the week of Easter, what is sometimes referred to as Passion or Holy Week. It is when Christians remember in a variety of ways Jesus' death on the Cross, our Lord's answer to the problem sin. It is fitting that last week the Vatican released an expansion of the seven deadly sins (http://www.cnn.com/2008/LIVING/wayoflife/03/13/new.sins/?iref=mpstoryview) […]

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March 8, 2008
Real Help for Marriages

I am experiencing the privilege of having conversations with Dr. Sharon Hart May, the author of books on safe haven marriages. Her latest book, How to Argue So Your Spouse Will Listen is one I give to every couple I counsel. My conversations by teleconference are focusing on EFT or Emotionally Focused Therapy, an approach […]

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March 1, 2008
Yes to Love No To Fear

I love (no pun intended) this quote from Henri Nouwen (a well known and respected Catholic theologian and spiritual director) about what love means: "Love means intimacy, closeness, mutual vulnerability, and a deep sense of safety." Obviously, I do not feel close to or intimate with his quote so my use of "love" is more […]

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February 18, 2008
Dramatic Improvement

I visited my website recently and was struck by the word transform. I was impressed by this because I know I do not have the power to transform anything. I hope I have not given the wrong impression and promise something that I cannot deliver. There is change in many of the people I work […]

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February 11, 2008
Faithfulness

I sit with many couples that have gone through adultery, or in the modern vernacular, "having an affair". The terms don't exactly mean the same thing. One of the definitions of affair in the dictionary is "a sexual relationship between two people not married to each other." Adultery on the other hand is defined as […]

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February 4, 2008
Emotionally Hijacked

Do you wonder how all of sudden you are in an argument that you did not see coming? You are upset and agitated before you know it and embroiled in a disagreeable disagreement with someone you love. Literally, you can be having a casual conversation and within milliseconds you're in emotional turmoil. To borrow a […]

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